Reflections of the Lake
Lake Life Quarantine 2020
2020 has been a beast. We closed out lake season last weekend and I was flooded with a series of thoughts that never used to come. But as quickly as they arrived, I reminded myself that ✨I’ve given up creating imaginative narratives that serve nothing but anxiety. ✨
It was never lost on us how lucky we are to have a safe home to use as an escape during the pandemic {thanks for the stay, Mom & Dad!}. We knew we couldn’t do much once we’d make it to our home away from home, but the change in walls was a blessing in itself. We were able to step out of the bubble and into another, giving us a moment in-between to catch out breath. Folks around the globe experienced anxiety/mental health battles unlike we’ve felt before. I was not immune.
The peace of the lake gave a reprieve from my mind. In the midst of this shared chaos I found clarity, ways to cope, comfort to ask for help (when you no longer enjoy a place that’s brought you eternal joy, it’s clear things are off), & the reminder that simplicity in nature will always center me. My dad grew up in a town nearby, making it out go to place when we’d be visiting my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. It is full of a lifetime of memories with family, summer friends, and new experiences.
As we closed up for the season I had a moment recalling how insane life had been. So much has changed since the day in late April that we first felt safe enough to make the hours long drive and unlock the door. So many moments I couldn’t have even predicted, though in retrospect, some I may have anticipated.
I could go on about our year, but I think the unbelievable amount of deaths while also adjusting to work/school needs, understanding new medical diagnosis within the family, and mental health reaching a 15 year low all during a global pandemic was enough to make it hard to come up for much air, let alone properly grieve not just the deaths, but the immense changes in life as we knew it.
I want to say we’ve had more good than bad but, it’s 2020. Those crap moments seem to have been piled on, making it hard to always remember all the good.
For a moment as we packed up last weekend I had a panicked thought of “after all that’s happened in the last 6 months, what is going to change between now and the spring?!” The fear of the unknown set in and the tears started {I may be in a good space, but I’m still allowed to be mentally exhausted lol}. It wasn’t too long after that I took those ever important breaths and the tears stopped.
In all the crap that has been thrown there also been bliss. New awareness. New appreciation. New strength. New niece!! Refocused priorities. Incredible perspective. Renewed friendships. Strengthened bonds. Ties cut, no regrets. Mental health realigned.
I could worry about “what’s next”. I could live each day in fear, tensely waiting for the next ball to drop. But instead I’ll appreciate the hell out of our extended family time, unexpected memories, shared joy of what the lake brought us this year, & anticipation of the lessons lake life will bring us next year.
Life will always have it challenges, but in them, I hope to never lose sight of the reflections gained in a summer at the lake. 💗
